I’m not going to lie to you guys, I find myself comparing myself to others a lot. Especially on social media. It’s kind of sick if you think about it, because most of the time, it just makes me feel bad about myself. Like oh wow they are so beautiful, I wish I looked like that. Oh wow their kid sits and plays by themselves? I wish mine did that. Oh wow their wardrobe is beautiful! I need to go shopping! Look where they got to travel to! Booking our trip now! I start off everyday feeling really grateful for what I have and what I’m surrounded by, and then by the end of the day I’m thinking about all of the ways I can improve our material surroundings. Wow that stings just to type. As I’m writing this out, I’m sitting in my living room in the home that we own. Wearing clothes that fit well and are fairly new. I’ve got a fresh manicure clacking away at the keys and the TV on in the background. I am lacking nothing in my life, and yet because of the comparison game I like to play, I often convince myself I am not good enough or don’t have enough.
I’m sure I am not alone in my struggle to appreciate the things that I have and not always wishing for better, prettier, bigger, etc. And it’s not just material things. I find myself looking at other’s lives and wishing I could be like them. Prettier, funnier, TALLER. Ya’ll I can’t tell you how much time I’ve wasted wishing I had an extra 5 inches!! I’m laughing at myself right now because really?! I mean yeah maybe jeans would fit me better, but come on.
Brian and I love traveling and exploring, and we get to do quite a bit of it, but then the comparison game starts up and I’m looking at all of these luxurious and exotic vacations we could be taking but just can’t afford at this point in our lives and again I begin to feel bad about what I have.
At this point you’re probably thinking I’m some crazy envious freak who is seconds away from blowing up my bank account to buy a brand new wardrobe and fly myself to Hawaii for an all inclusive beach vacay, never to be heard of again (except of course for my perfectly curated instagram posts 😉 ). But, to be honest, this sort of discontent I realized was growing in me was much more subtle. A quick little feeling as I scrolled through my insta feed and saw a perfect looking woman holding her perfect looking child, that led to some online shopping. Or a quick Pinterest search for the top ten most beautiful places to visit in the world that led to some discontented feelings that created an argument between me and my husband. Things that the devil was using to subtly break down my contentment. My appreciation for the wonderful life I have. The trust in God that I have.
So what am I going to do about it? Well, this year, I decided my “word of the year” would be contentment. I want joy and contentment in our home, and that starts with me. So my goal for this year is to stop comparing. What one person can afford, wear, look like, do, go to, etc, isn’t necessarily what I can do and thats okay. Because there is probably something I can do, have, look like, etc. that they can’t. Their child may sit still for a picture AND smile, but hey, I have a lot of really cute candid pictures and funny blurry pictures. We all have something that we bring to the table. We all have blessings and gifts. Instead of trying to have and be everything, maybe we should work on having hearts that can be content in all circumstances like the apostle Paul talked about in Philippians 4. By being more aware of comparisons, prayer, spending more time in God’s word, and reminding myself every morning of at least three things that I have to be thankful for, I am combating comparisons and discontent! None of this is to say that I think shopping, growing, working hard and achieving things is bad. Those things are fine and can be great! But, it’s all about how we treat them and what we let control our feelings and thoughts. Let’s let CHRIST control our feelings and thoughts! God is the source of our blessings and self worth and only through him can we feel true contentment.
“…I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:11-13
6 thoughts on “Your Life Is Better Than My Life”
So true! Yes, social media can be such a comparison trap. You’re not alone. ☺ Thanks for sharing.
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Thank you for reading!!
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You are a very wise niece, Dear Ashlea. This is well written, too. Thank you for your insight.
I really enjoy reading your posts, Ashlea. You are such a beautiful, wise Mama. I love that your word for 2019 is “contentment.” You’re absolutely right—contentment and gratitude go hand-in-hand. Great thoughts, Friend.
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Thank you!! 💕