It’s no secret that as human beings, we tend to compare ourselves with others. Becoming a mother showed me a whole new side to this tendency in ourselves! The challenges mothers face every day can be so difficult, and can cause us to feel insecure. So many times, this leads to an attitude of competition rather than community. I understand this feeling! You want to make sure you’re doing everything right because you don’t want to do anything wrong by your kids. So, the tendency to judge and compete can begin to creep in.
But, I want to challenge all of you mamas (and all of you other humans), to seek community over competition. Encourage each other! If a fellow mama is struggling, offer advice in a kind and helpful way. Or just be a listening ear!!
Social media can make it so hard to see that others are struggling, because typically we are posting the pretty “highlight reel” pictures. And that’s totally okay. I mean personally, I don’t really want to post a picture of myself without any make up and day three of unwashed hair!! Of course, we would all rather post a picture of a smiling happy family. But, just remember that those are literally the picture-perfect moments. And those are not 100% of anybody’s lives. So, if you see a mama struggling, reach out. Be supportive. Because this is hard, and nobody can do it alone.
And to those who are struggling, try to reach out. Find that one mama, or group of mamas, that you can confide in, talk to, vent to. Don’t be afraid, because I promise, we are ALL feeling the same way!! In fact, today as I am writing this, my child is napping after having screamed, fussed and whined for hours!! I mean that kind of thing can be mentally draining and so exhausting! It can make you feel alone and like you’ve failed in some way. And in moments like those, you need people who have gone through or are going through similar things to keep you sane!
So, to avoid more rambling, I’ll summarize by saying this: Try your best to avoid those competitive feelings. Remember we are ALL struggling no matter what you see on social media. Seek out those who are struggling. Allow yourself to seek out others when YOU are struggling. And good luck mamas! Whatever you’re facing today, you can do it!!
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion…” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)